"swim in its change"

Entered the beach I knew so well, now it was destroyed by man's bleachers. Row after row of special stadium seats, on the sidelines of the shore. People talking, watching, bathing in the midnight sun that burned hotter than hell. Flags, radios, lifeguard towers and beach houses rose from the cove. Steep up and away from the black water bubbling with bodies and boats. The environment soiled, disjointed from all I knew as an innocent child. But I was happy to be back, and so slowly joined the water to swim in its change.

8-18-11

Sun sets heavy

God's Away On Business

☺ ‎"It's a court jester's chair, a rare one, five-hundred years old. Please, sit on it. Say something funny; make me stop wanting to cry." ☹

"Half starved livin' off pills and salads."

(Suddenly, Last Summer suddenly this summer)

"Coffee, Black."

"Tea, Earl Grey, Hot."

"my baby gums"

My sister with long hair down to her waist, said she just got it done. It felt static electric like velvet. Michelle smoked across from her at a metal table on my dark little balcony with the astroturf floor.

"Next time I'm going to cut it to my baby gums." Said my sister, referring to her boobs.

8-11-11

Letting go of parkdale

Home in the Future Dream

I was leaving my father, my partner, at the home I grew up in. I was happy and sad, and so was this man. To get away from him standing on the veranda, I walked down the stairs, across the driveway then behind the garage. Much time had gone by since I was a child at that home. Seasons summer to spring passed as I traveled by fir trees, ferns, and the cedar shingles. By the woodpile on my way to the compost in the woods, snow melted and I looked back to the house. My bed pillow left out through the winter lay on the grass, and dried quickly in the new sunshine.

Today's escape....

Water flows on Mars

8-8-11

I miss my mommy

***NEW HOUSE***

Come visit me!

Beyonce and I shrink

In the balcony of the KVHS theatre, waiting to watch the opening night performance of Footloose, I saw Chelsea and her mother and they were really happy to see me. The theatre was well lit, obviously renovated, asymmetrical, and high tech. In the other balcony sat the background singers, each sitting at a table with a microphone ready to go.

I floated down the aisle after saying goodbye to Chelsea and Roni, and ended up backstage. Beyonce was there. She exited the backstage doors and walked down the street, with me not far behind.

I followed her to a high-rise building on the Saint John harbour, when she turned to me and started talking. She was jaded, but I told her I was gay, that we were the same age, and that I had been a huge fan since the beginning of her career. She smiled and we became friends. Inviting me up to her hotel room, we entered the elevator where I saw my reflection in the mirror and noticed my hair was going grey.

Her room was a mess. I looked around, saw the ocean out the window, and she offered me a coffee as she made herself a bowl of cereal. As we stood together at the table, I noticed that we both had started to shrink in height.

Then the door opened and a wave of people came in. I recognized Beyonce's mother, she was with James Cromwell in a low-cut tank-top, and several maids.

James said aggressively "Who is that?" referring to me, and Beyonce assured him that I was a friend. One of the cleaning ladies came over, Beyonce and I were getting shorter.

This cleaning lady had a hose, and started spraying the wall with a thick blue cleaner. It splashed onto me, leaving blue specks on my skin, Beyonce turned me away format, trying to shield me from the goo and I woke up.